Sunday, February 28, 2010

How Did Mom Do This?

I look back on the way things were for my mom, and now with a daughter of my own, I wonder how the heck did my mom do this?!
Having one baby is one thing but having multiples (two or more babies at one birth is a completely different thing and give these women a lot of credit for what they do).  For my mom, by the time I was about 18 months my sister was born.  So juggling one newborn and another who is not even two plus errands and housework.  How do mom’s in general do this!?
Well before I had my own I thought it was simple, ok I lied I knew motherhood was tough but really?! when you don’t have children of your own, well at least in my experience, you just don’t understand 100 percent.  Motherhood is definitely the hardest job I have ever had but hands down it is the most amazing, rewarding and fulfilling job I could’ve asked for and would never trade it for the world. 
I keep asking the question: how do they do it? Now with a little of experience behind me I can now say “I just do it”!  It's become a part of my life and go with the general flow of things.  Sure before I could just pick up and go with no organizing or planning needed and yes sometimes (it is VERY rare) I can do it that way.  But lets be realistic now, planning and organization is key… Where were these life skills back in college!
Planning and organization like I mentioned is one of the key ingredients to success with this job, for the most part (please keep in mind that this may just be me but hey I like to share).  Keeping on task, which I yet need to manage to perfect or at least get there.  I start one thing than get distracted by the baby and once all is said and done I forgot what I was doing prior and start something new.  My mom would tell me that she would start cleaning lets say the upstairs bathroom get distracted with one of us kids forget about the bathroom and after would go start something else.  Its not like she wanted multiple jobs started around the house and not finish them its only because not only does prego-brain affect most women during pregnancy but it carries through to motherhood – as I like to call it mommy-brain.  After all is said and done my mom would have buckets all around the house because she would forget about the other job she started.  I at first laughed about this until I caught myself doing something similar…
Well what I am trying to get at is that I have learned that there is no perfect way of doing things and parenthood is not a job that can be perfected.  My mom got through things because she had to and it was a job that had to get done by someone.  Children don’t come with instructions as all parents come to realize at some point or another and, of course, we all wish they did.  This is definitely a job that you can’t learn from a book but by personal experience and with what works best for you and your family. 
Now, I do what I can do when I can do it – my priority is my daughter and I do the best that I can do with how I know how to do it.  If it didn’t work I’ll try and sort out another solution (my mom always told me those problem solving skills from school would come in handy).
Still unsure if I have really answered my own question but within I feel I have.  All I know is is that I am thankful for my family and for doing the best that they could do with how they knew how to do it.  Its nice to have that new bond with my parents now that I am one.

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